This is dangerous. This feeling that consumes me. It so unbelievably dangerous. But I just can't seem to get enough of it. It's addictive. A substance that I don't want to lose. A substance that has taken root in my mind, and has snaked through the channels of my brain. I would die without it. Every nerve would lose it's sense. No smell. No taste. No touch. Nothing. Just a solid, black, emptiness.
An emptiness that I used to fear. That meant only pain and numbness, only despair and anguish. Has it changed? Has it become something that could save me. A safety net for when I fall from this high. When I finally lose the steady ground and plummet to an almost certain end. Will it be the one that I can still trust when all this is over. Because I know there will be an end. There is always an end, nothing can last forever. Because even forever has an end.
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