I always assumed that I would have a thousand things to say on the first day of the new year, yet I seem to be drawing a blank. My mind is just a little bit more muddled than usual and it's taking awhile to adjust. It takes me a second every morning to remember where I am and where I am going, which seems to grow more uncertain every day. I am finding it harder and harder to plant my feet on the ground, everything seems better with my head up in the clouds. Everything seems easier to sort out when my mind is out of focus, and maybe that explains why I have been day dreaming so much lately. Tuning out everything around me and falling into a world of my own. A world where none of this has happened, a place where I have what I want and what I need.
Some times I think I have fallen a little too far. A little too fast. And I can't seem to find my way back out, I thought I would be okay with that. I thought I would be okay with not knowing what to do. Not seeing the angry stares and knowing what they mean. At the same time though I wouldn't be able to live in ignorance. I wouldn't be able to deal with life and be completely oblivious to everything that goes on around me. Everything seems to change, one little move and I face a whole new line of enemies. Better keep fighting.
No comments:
Post a Comment